Words of Life

It is my sincere desire that every man in our fellowship enjoyed their Thanksgiving celebration.  I know I did. In our men's group, we continued our study into Chapter Twelve of "Bond of Brothers" by Wes Yoder.  I asked the men to read the chapter, find a passage that moves them and then explain why it moved them.  I also expect them to explain what it moved them to do.  Yesterday, we made it through two passages.  Why only two?   Because one of the men highlighted one of the most powerful passages in the chapter.  The inescapable ability of a man to be a life giver, life taker, and life receiver all in the space of one day.
The study came to life as the men opened up their hearts to what is obviously a common problem among most men.  I've never understood why we can move so easily from being able to bring life, take life, and then receive life until yesterday.
It is the power of the tongue, the deception of pride, and the gift of mercy that live simultaneously within us.  It is because we are a new creation that is both Christ, and Man, or as Wes Yoder calls us, the Christ-Man.  We are at war with ourselves, and depending upon where we are in our maturity, the tide of the battle can swing in an instant. I know in my own life, that life taking words usually hang on the power of one word drawn up from the wellspring of pride.  In an instant, I can cut someone with a caustic or casual remark.  I've also found that the words of life are slower to come to my tongue, and require greater thought.  If they are born of the Holy Spirit, it is an even longer process, as I try to discern if I'll receive any praise or recognition for what I said.  True life giving words, are born of compassion, real love, and a desire to speak life into someone.  Words that take life are usually spoken to defend myself, or to bring someone down to size.  As if that is my job.
Throughout the study, we began to hit upon an even more novel idea.  The problem with being a life taker, is that the words we need to mend the situation, and restore relationship, are hollow at best.  Saying you are "sorry" doesn't make amends.  We have to bring something to the table.  We have to come with our hat in hand, and wearing sackcloth.  In other words, true regret for our words, or actions, must be held out in humility.  As we grow in Christ, we find the 'life taker' part of our Christ-Man is less apt to reveal himself.  The more we live in God's wisdom, the better we become at keeping our trap shut, and our hearts guarded with the love of Christ.  If we live as watchmen, guarding the walls of our heart with the compassion of the Holy Spirit, we will find our opportunities to be 'life-givers' will far exceed our moments of murderous pride. It is in those moments, we can receive life with a joyous heart.
Coming to Christ is easy, being a Christ-Man is not.

The Issue is TRUST. . . Always was

It's taken me a while to write this because I've spent the last month working, remodeling our own home, and of course the usual (and unusual) church activities.  For the past two weeks, eighteen hour days have been the norm.  NOT WHINING, just explaining.   Actually it felt good to have our home prepared for friends and family this thanksgiving.
The men of our fellowship never cease to amaze me.  We're on chapter twelve of "Bond of Brothers" by Wes Yoder, and it is enjoyable to hear the comments coming from each of the men.  You learn a lot about your brother in the Lord when you ask them to share their favorite passage from the chapter.  As we began our around the table discussion, you could sense that there were very strong feelings about what Bro. Yoder wrote.  One of the things I like about the book, is that you can read it over and over without exhausting his profound insights into the Christian lifestyle.  I would like to meet him someday, preferably before exiting this present vale.
Our conversation though, got hung up on the idea guilt, confession, and sin.  NO SURPRISE!  Of course, these were the central themes of the book.  How do we as men come to the point where we can be real with one another?   What is needed to make a true 'bond of brothers?'  What does it take to move beyond the masks, facades, and fig-leafs we choose to cover ourselves with?
It takes trust, and always has.  Trust is the absolute surrender to someone else.  There can't be a relationship without trust.  It is why it is impossible to please God without it.  You have to believe that he exists and that he rewards those who diligently seek him.  That relationship with God can't become it's fullest relationship, without trust in your brothers and sisters in the Lord.  It implies being honest, transparent, dependable, and forgiving.  Those traits are hard to find in people who are self-centered.
As the discussion moved into deeper waters, we found ourselves discussing the issue of failure, sin, and mistakes. Is there hope for the recovering addict, the habitual liar, the man bound by porn, or even the less visible sins of gossip, cruelty, covetousness. . . .ad infinitum.   Can we expect to have real relationships with other men, when we won't even admit to ourselves that these things exist in ourselves?
Here is my take on the discussion, and a sloppy answer to at least one of the questions.

LOVE!

I know, it's a cheap shot. The three things that test our love are often the three things that keep us from loving to the full.  Pride is the number one issue we face in any relationship.  If someone disrespects us, it is extremely difficult to move beyond the injury to our pride.  One of the biggest relationship killers, is wounded pride.  Snide hurtful comments, winks, rebuffs, and snubs shake our sense of worth.  It's true of marriages, families, and friends.  The pride-full will often mask their insecurity by destroying the pride of others around them. Pride is the only thing God resists.  Why?  Because it is impossible to have a relationship when you are in competition with the one you love.  At one point or another, you will have to submit, or the relationship will die.
Another relationship killer is misunderstanding.  This comes from people trying to wear masks all the time.  Ask any married woman what she wants most from her man, and she'll tell you intimacy.  It's the same thing for any relationship.  Misunderstanding springs from a lack of intimacy.  When you really know someone, you know the 'why' of what they do.  It is why knowing that God is good, means you know that even when things don't make sense, you know He will make it work out for your good.  Intimacy is knowing the character of the person you are in a relationship with.
Lack of trust will kill any relationship.  It is essential.  I refuse to believe any relationship can endure a lack of trust.  That doesn't mean it won't be tested, tried, and even trashed, but trust is essential.  Love is impossible without trust.  AND YES!  As men of faith we are to love one another.  Commandment from the LORD!  Implied in that commandment to LOVE, is the equally strong commandment to trust.  If we can't trust our brother who we can see, how can we trust our God who we can't see?  The Bond of Brothers is all about trust, always was.

   

Am I Really Saved?

We finished up with Chapter Eleven in our men’s group study into the book Bond of Brothers by Wes Yoder.  We had four men from last week who didn't get the opportunity to share their favorite passage, so we spent the better half of the hour, finishing up last week’s business.   The passages took on a different flavor this week.  Those who shared this week shared more passages dealing with the community aspect of the chapter.  For those who weren't there, let me sum it up. 

Dying to ourselves, (a uniquely Christian concept)  is more than denying yourself, and being a good person.  It is a true change in who, and even what we are.  We become a new creation in Christ, unlike the person we were before.  Wes Yoder makes a very profound argument that our death to this present world, brings us into a community of life.  It is a relationship with the creator that binds us together in love.  It goes beyond knowing that He exists.  It goes beyond agreeing that Jesus is the Son of God.  Even the demons believe.  There is something more profound, and powerful that happens when we die to ourselves.  Our identity becomes the community of faith.   It should be the hallmark of our faith, not the exception.  I  wonder though, can it truly exist in America?   Are the Amish, and Mennonites the only ones who understand the sense of community we have in Christ Jesus?  Is there hope for the modern evangelical church?  Is there hope for me?  Can I live in this connected, hyper, electronic  age of wizardry and exhibit the kind of community that is based on Christ?   I’m not going to presume to speak for the other men, but I can tell you that my conscience was pricked by the comments made yesterday. 

It made me wonder if I was truly saved.  YES, you heard me right.  I grew up in the hellfire and brimstone days of Pentecostalism.  When I was a young man, going to football games was considered sinful.  Movies were completely out of the question.  Dancing was a sure indicator that you were a child of the devil, and don’t even get me going on smoking, or alcohol.  I never knew about John chapters 14 – 17.  You never heard them from the pulpit.  The measure of your salvation was made by what you abstained from, not what you did.  Gossip was entertainment, bickering was fun, and fighting over the color of the carpet was considered blasé.   How was I supposed to know that I’d been given everything I needed for life and Godliness?  No one ever told me that thinking on whatever was pure, and right, meant that I had to do those pure, and right things.  No one ever explained how we were to live in one accord.   Now I’m left with more troubling questions for myself. 

At 57 years of age going on 58,  AM I REALLY BORN AGAIN?   

After all these years, I know that there are still pockets of ME that haven’t been given over to Christ.  He isn’t Lord over all of me. 

What about my job?  I don’t have enough time to take care of my brother’s needs.  Do I really have to surrender everything?  Who’ll take care of me?  What about everybody else?  

The issue is time.  I can give money easily.  I love to give money.  I get a thrill out of knowing that there are people in Nicaragua who have a meal because I give. 

I can pray.  I've always enjoyed praying.  It’s easy.  I believe in prayer.  While prayer may be a problem for others, it isn't for me.  However, there are other things I don’t do.  My level of concern for the welfare of others is minimal at best.  I’m not heartless, just insensitive. 

The issue for me is time.  I’m not talking about the time given to the maintenance of the church, or even the daily to do of the fellowship, but more of the helpful concern for the daily lives of others.  I’m talking about the time given to spiritual relationships with one another. 

Our discussion Sunday morning caused me to do some serious soul searching.  Where am I in my life?  What do I really believe?  Am I really saved?  Am I still being de-programmed from the works oriented philosophy of my youth, or will I exchange my feel good measurements from one system of measurement for another.  Will my ‘serve’ be better than my volley? 

Is it something entirely different? 

I asked the men to go ahead and read chapter twelve, and be prepared to explain what they think a community of faith should be like.  I sure hope they don’t give me more to feel bad about.    I’m trying to work my way through last week.