For those of you who've been following along, and wondering where I've been, it's not that I'm being unfaithful to the Blog, but we've been saying some sensitive things and mentioning names. It's hard to write 'around' that without causing people to say: “He's talking about me.” As of late, we've been opening a few shut doors that are difficult to write about when you don't have the permission of the other party involved. Silence is the prudent choice.
We're now in chapters 17 and 18 of Every Man's Marriage. These chapters should have been one chapter, but I'm not an editor. It's like I told the men, these are the chapters that make it clear what our job as spiritual leaders of the home should be. I believe every man in our group could take the sub-chapter headings and make a mission statement out of it.
MISSION STATEMENT OF THE BRAGG FAMILY SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE ADMINISTRATOR
My mission is through careful study and application of the word of God, to provide my family with all the necessary tools to succeed spiritually, financially, and emotionally in this life. I will accomplish this task through complete submission to the Spirit of Christ, as evidenced by a worshipful life at home and in my workplace. I will lead my family in consistent prayer and family devotion, forgiving quickly and asking forgiveness, just as Christ has forgiven me. I will set the Spiritual compass of my family through a real and vibrant relationship with Christ, living an uncompromising faith as evidenced by holy actions. This is my one true act of love.
I can't and won't speak to those who are marginal Christians, or not even Christians at all. You can't talk spiritual truths to those who refuse to see the spiritual truth around them. Non-Christians will not accept the concept of the man being the spiritual leader of the home. Very few Christians accept it. They will point to single mothers, same sex unions, and other variations upon the family theme, and ask; “What about them?” I can't address it. Single mothers have had one of three things happen to them to make them single mothers, either the husband opted out of the leadership role, the wife opted out of marriage role, or the death of the husband forced it upon them. Spiritual leadership is not a choice. If the man of the house is not stepping up to the plate, then someone must. That someone is usually the wife. That doesn't change a thing about God's demands. Argue it with God, not me.
In Chapter 17, the authors made a fantastic list of things we need to do, in order to be the proper spiritual leader of the home. I incorporated them into my mission statement, but here they are in list form.
- Develop the deepest KNOWLEDGE of God's word
- Be the best at submitting to scripture.
- Be the most comfortable with worshiping at home.
- Be the most consistent in your prayer and devotional life
- Be the quickest to forgive and ask forgiveness
- Set the spiritual thermostat in your home.
Today, we launched out into studying the first two on our list. This list is useless, if you don't believe in Christ. Everything the authors have mentioned in the previous chapters can be done without a relationship with Christ, although the result will be a self-serving 'goodness,' that nets you brownie points and thank you's from the one you love. Still, at it's best, it results in you getting something for being a loving, devoted husband. It could be as simple as everyone saying how wonderful you are, to your wife doting over your every need. The true Christian husband is going to do those things simply because Christ demands it of him. A faithful slave does not expect thanks. As we discussed last week, if you find yourself wanting your wife to reward you with pats on your poh-poh, you've stepped back into the carnal. If she gives it to you, good! If she don't, don't get mad at her. Look at your own life. Are you thanking her for her efforts.
The six point list above, is all about the spiritual life of your home. A christian home would be hard pressed to survive without the husband doing at least three of the six items above. The first two are foundational. If you aren't reading and studying the word, you're not going to get the rest. It's impossible. If you aren't applying the word, you can forget it.
Within the Word of God is the answer to every dilemma and decision in our life. The Word of God can even tell you what TV shows to watch, what movies to rent, what job to take, and what town to live in. The Word of God covers every aspect of life. Just in the book of Proverbs alone, you can find the answers to the most prickly of life's issues.
One of the issues we dealt with was the author's use of the phrase 'deepest knowledge of God's Word.” The question arose as to whether we are in a competition with our spouses as to who has the greatest knowledge of God's word. What about women teachers on the TV who seemingly posses a greater revelation of God's word than their husbands. This is a non-issue! The husband who is reading his word daily, will be the leader of the home. He will provide the nourishing atmosphere that allows his wife to express the Word of God to others. It is exactly the opposite closed minded type of thinking that Christ came to destroy. His love allows the bride to be all that she can be spiritually. Not only does he allow it, but he encourages it. As husbands, we can do no less. Our example is before us. If we find ourselves asking; “What about me?” we've already stepped out of the spiritual leadership role.
It's not enough to just read the word, we have to be the first to submit to that word, and we'll be talking about that, next week.
